One father is more than a hundred Schoolemasters. ~George Herbert, Outlandish Proverbs, 1640
Dad, you're someone to look up to no matter how tall I've grown. ~Author Unknown
Spread the diaper in the position of the diamond with you at bat. Then fold second base down to home and set the baby on the pitcher's mound. Put first base and third together, bring up home plate and pin the three together. Of course, in case of rain, you gotta call the game and start all over again. ~Jimmy Piersal, on how to diaper a baby, 1968
I'm sixty years of age. That's 16 Celsius. ~George Carlin, Brain Droppings, 1997
Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected. ~Red Buttons
Blessed indeed is the man who hears many gentle voices call him father! ~Lydia M. Child, Philothea: A Romance, 1836
Dad, your guiding hand on my shoulder will remain with me forever. ~Author Unknown
Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician. ~Author Unknown
Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once. ~Dave Barry, "Your Disintegrating Body," Dave Barry Turns 40, 1990
Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected. ~Red Buttons
Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional. ~Chili Davis
First you forget names; then you forget faces; then you forget to zip up your fly; and then you forget to unzip your fly. ~Branch Rickey
A birthday is just the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun. Enjoy the trip. ~Author Unknown
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